Why it's okay to lose friends

Why do we lose friends

As we advance, our priorities take a turn, and we begin to lose friends, we start wondering why we are losing friends, we feel we are all alone, this can even bring about being depressed, but I'm here to let you know that it's okay if you lose some friends at a point, some friends come into our lives, and they are very free to leave for reasons best known to them, we will always miss them, but thankfully, real friends never leave. Studies has shown that the number of friends in our lives decreases as we grow older, it takes a lot of effort to nurture and grow friendship, though not all friendships deserve a lot of effort, feel free to stay away from any form of friendship that is not working out, friendships may grow stronger or weaker, it never remains the same, also, growth comes with maturity, experiences, and a lot of responsibilities, therefore we tend to be selective of friends based on our values.

For some, responsibilities and leading a hectic life don't give the time to keep up with friends, priorities change, it could be marriage or a new job, you now have to direct all your attention to taking care of your family, especially when kids are involved, you are left with little or no time for socialization, and if you have a job, it also leaves you with no time to attend to your friends because you are busy working hard,this gives you limited time for your friends, you don't get to see them as often as you used to, it's during this period, you get to know your genuine friends, they understand your busy schedule, they will always call you to know how you are coping, and they are still willing to be part of your life, they are always there to encourage you, and they want you to be the best you can be....it's also very important for you to reciprocate all the love you get from your good friends, inorder to keep it going. However, the fair weather friends will gradually cut you off from their lives beause they can't keep up anymore, and are not willing to go extra miles to make it work.
Losing friends

Good friends are the ones who will encourage you when you feel low, support and motivate you through your trying times, good friends are happy when you are happy, they tolerate one another, and give in their best, they are very much worth the effort, regardless of how busy and occupied life gets. When life throws its challenges at You, only then will you find out those friends who mean well for You, those who will stick around and those who will turn their back. And when you are winning, those good friends will be there to cheer in support, they will be your number one fan, of course, your victory is their victory, and theirs is yours, while the fake friends will resent your success, they always secretly wait for a bad news.

What about those friends whose lives revolve around moving from one place to another, to different countries for jobs, in search of greener pastures, to acquire education, all these processes shape who we are and the number of friends we have, you now have to meet up less frequently because you are far away, it's not every friend that will be in contact with you and vice versa. Recall the time you were in school, you had many friends, even acquaintances were regarded as friends, but when school ended, majority of those friendships ended alongside it, only a few kept it going, keeping in touch and caring in many other ways. Note that the 'not good enough friends' will check once in a while just to make sure you are not doing better than they are. This is why it's important to sieve your friends, weed them out, nobody can ever fare well in a toxic relationship, you can use the bad times you've experienced to measure your friends, those who stood by you and those who didn't, not everybody you regarded as a friend stood up to the true definition of friendship.

It's the fair weather friends that says oh! I won't call first....i won't send a message first...why should I be the one to.... If you are not losing friends, then you are not growing, you are still stagnant. Some friends have a hidden agenda, they are there to use you for their selfish gains, I am ready to lose any friend who tries to dominate me, because i can't cope or even survive that, but then not all friendship last forever, we don't have to manage our friends, having to manage friends because of lack of option is a ridiculous thing to do, you don't have to remain with people who do not measure up to the standard of true friendship, we also need to be the best we can be to our friends, we should do unto them, what we want for ourselves, we should never hesitate to lend a helping hand, and be there for our friends too, and we shouldn't expect so much from our friends, it's even possible that the reason we lose friends is us, the reason you lose friends is YOU, we should work on ourselves too, be the friend you want your friends to be. So you are doing your best, yet, some of your friends are still not worth it, some friends only call you when they need something from you, but they never ever give anything in return, friends are supposed to be there for each other, to lift one another up, to motivate each other inorder to achieve success, it should never be one sided, one sided friendship sucks, therefore be wary of undeserving friends, they will drain you more than anything, they are the ones who will hurt you deliberately, and try to be in an unnecessary competition, what we all need is a healthy competition, so it's totally fine if you lose these kind of friends.